O wad some power the giftie gie us, to see ourselves as others see us, says your diarist, with apologies to the immortal bard whose memory we will have toasted since we last met.

Isn’t it odd, this obsession with broadleaved, native trees? Isn’t it odd, this obsession with ancient trees ? How could such an eminent figure as depicted in the national press recently be shown leaning on a dangerously diseased ancient oak riddled with decay and on its last legs, voted tree of the year by a whole gamut of forestry experts who ought – please – to know better. Much as I respect and enjoy ancient trees, decaying hulks like the one depicted surely can’t be contenders for the title against the opposition of a fine Douglas, in its prime, or a graceful western hemlock – or, for that matter, a clean, clear, healthy native Scots pine. Or any number of others. I walk my dog frequently past a grove of Sequoias which are some 70 years old and magnificent. But to the good old British public, ‘tree experts’ must be seen to have a strange sympathy for old age, ill health and decrepitude. 

All manner of spokespeople contributed last month to a Sunday Times article, yes, you’ve guessed it, all lauding oaks, ash and beech as the species of the future, all proposing that forestry is only of any value if diversity is the aim. 

I had to suppress a snort of laughter. Hadn’t the experts quoted ever heard of ash dieback, of ink disease or the invidious acute oak decline, before pontificating on a subject they clearly didn’t know or understand? One actually identified public enemy number one as a “straight lines of pine trees which will never have any diversity value”.

No mention that beech is not at all a native species and will be susceptible to a rise in the global temperature on the edge of its range as will no other. And the aforementioned imported tree diseases won’t just go away. But what is sad about this is that new planting will have to be proof against not only our changing climate both now and in the future, but also the pathetic public perception that actually supports policies which encourage grey squirrels and deer and has no higher ambition than to reproduce the doomed hulk I spotted in the papers. Its pictured patron is a well-known conservationist, but no names, no pack drill. But he of all people ought to know better.

I know I am always wittering on about our public image, but it really annoys me that we – and I embrace you, FJ readers – can’t get across the message of modern mixed-objective forest management, which not only creates habitat and diversity but also aims and succeeds in producing commercial timber. Say it again. We import over 80 per cent of our sawn timber, the vast majority of which is square-edged softwood. We are only surpassed by the booming Chinese construction industry, which looks a bit dodgy nowadays, so we might just make the number-one spot soon. As well as win the World Cup. Any forest policy which ignores this statistic must be potty, as must the vast planting programme envisaged as part of our contribution to net zero. 

As one who made a good living out of forest valuations, what is the price of plantable land? What is the effect of restrictions like national parks and flood control? Why would farmers, landowners and whoever else knock back the value of their investment in farmland by some 90 per cent before a tree is planted? One thing is sure in England at least. You won’t ever get rich creating habitat for oak processionary moths or threatened butterflies. Not for squirrels or buffalos either, for that matter, but yes, we’ve been there before, haven’t we.

Well, throughout all the chaos and confusion that besets us all, there has been little or no enthusiasm for an agricultural or forestry policy which consigns the bad old days of the CAP to the dustbin of history, has there? Informed sources say the proposed planting programme of some 30,000 hectares of new planting is already a dead duck. It’s called ELMS, but I repeat myself yet again.

I will scan the next Sunday Times letters page for a response to last week’s nonsense.

Where are you, president of the Institute? Where is the FRS and indeed where is Confor?

I have taken just a little comfort from seeing that our local MP has been selected to resolve the rail strike. He represents the good old Forest of Dean. Could be useful one day, that.

A guid New Year to you.